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Is Spirituality for losers? The short answer is yes and no.
No: If you think of a loser as the classic definition of the word, someone who is losing in life, while others are winning.
Yes: If you think of a loser as someone ready to lose everything; fears, desires, and one’s mind, to gain everything.
Often spirituality is seen as something like a hobby or nice fable, something you are interested in for a while and then go on with your life.
In my experience, especially highly educated, and scientific people, seem to have a problem with spiritual concepts that currently can’t be proven by scientific tools.
It’s also no surprise that it’s more often than not males who belittle spirituality because men usually put more emphasis on reason and intellect than emotions and intuition. In his book The King Within, Robert Moore called this the left-brain barrier to divinity.
But many of the problems arise with a false idea of what spirituality is. Much of the information on spirituality is distraction. And we often use it as a form of escapism, like a science fiction book.
But spirituality is part of our human essence. And instead, of solely using it to make ourselves feel better, it should be used to confront and question reality.
“Spiritual life is the bouquet, the perfume, the flowering and fulfillment of a human life, not a supernatural virtue imposed upon it.” – Joseph Campbell The Power of Myth
What Spirituality Not Is
It’s easy to fall into the trap of spiritual bypassing. This is a term coined by John Welwood which states, that through spiritual practices one avoids facing suppressed emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks.
This then tends to stall our emotional, psychological, and spiritual development.
Therefore, spirituality should not be a free pass to look away. Rather, spiritual practices should help you discover not only your positive self but also your shadow self, the parts you’d rather not confront.
Being spiritual means applying radical truth to all areas of life including yourself.
You can only change the things you recognize and accept. If you refuse to look at your flaws and shadows, you can’t integrate them nor change them.
Spirituality is not just something you choose to believe. Whether you like it or not, spirituality is part of who you are.
Moreover, neglecting your physical body is not spiritual either. Spirituality should enable us to accept and embrace our humaneness.
Spirituality should not end up in refusing responsibility. It is taking responsibility, and this includes your physical, mental, and spiritual space.
When we take responsibility, we have choices, when we don’t, we are powerless.
Be a Real Loser
To be a real loser requires you to question society and the beliefs it has forced on you your entire life. It requires you to ask yourself why you are doing the things you are doing.
Everything you do in life is either to avert suffering or gain happiness.
Your whole life you have been programmed to believe that you have to be someone. And this someone has to be rich, successful, beautiful, famous.
And for what?
To be happy.
Spirituality teaches us to stop looking outside for answers and turn inward.
When you first venture on this path, you might want to drop out of the rat race. This is then where society considers you a ‘loser’.
What helps is simply admit to being a loser so that you can be a winner.
Often we are scared of being a ‘loser’ in society’s eyes. So, we try too hard to be a ‘winner’ and end up the ‘loser’ instead.
Accepting both sides will enable you to transcend the idea of loser and winner.
You start to refuse to live your life according to other people’s beliefs and values.
If you continue to believe that you will be happy when you get this job, buy this new car, or find a new relationship you are hopelessly lost.
To be a real loser you have to give up the thought that happiness is something you have lost. That it is something that must be gained through endless pursuits of illusionary happiness.
“At any moment, you have a choice, that either leads you closer to your spirit or further away from it.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
You will then realize that happiness is right here. All you have to do is to remove the blocks to it.
These blocks come, among others, in the form of fear, guilt, desire, and the endless rationalizations of the mind.
When you let go of the blocks, you will be happy right here, right now without reason. That’s how we have been when we were children.
This is the ultimate freedom, the freedom of the belief that we are not good enough, the freedom of the ego’s clutches, the freedom to be.
When we realize that there is nothing to win and nothing to lose, we can finally be true total losers and enjoy life to the fullest.
Luka
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